September 21, 2007

A beautiful tapestry: Jubilarians renew vows at Golden Wedding Anniversary Mass

Archbishop Daniel M. Buechlein greets St. Mark the Evangelist parishioners Donald and Ruth Allen of Indianapolis during the 23rd annual archdiocesan Golden Wedding Anniversary Mass on Sept. 16 at SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral in Indianapolis. The Allens have been married for 67 years.

Archbishop Daniel M. Buechlein greets St. Mark the Evangelist parishioners Donald and Ruth Allen of Indianapolis during the 23rd annual archdiocesan Golden Wedding Anniversary Mass on Sept. 16 at SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral in Indianapolis. The Allens have been married for 67 years.

By Mary Ann Wyand

It was a warm September day, a perfect time of the year, for longtime married couples from central and southern Indiana to renew their marriage vows.

“Your stories form a beautiful tapestry” of faithful love, Archbishop Daniel M. Buechlein told 155 couples married 50 years and longer during the 23rd annual archdiocesan Golden Wedding Anniversary Mass on Sept. 16 at SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral in Indianapolis.

“Today we gather to thank you for your witness to fidelity in marriage … [and your] steady love for our Church,” Archbishop Buechlein said in his homily. “We thank God for the abundant grace he has given you.”

He reminded the jubilarian couples that young people look to their elders for spiritual direction and moral support.

“We celebrate the simple beauty and the life-giving power of golden years of keeping promises,” he said. “The golden anniversary of your marriages is a life-giving beacon of hope for our society, especially our youth. … You are witnesses to the fidelity of Jesus. Your lives together in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, are a witness [to others] … that with the grace of God we can keep promises for life.”

Daniel Sarell, director of the archdiocesan Office of Family Ministries, told the gathering that the 155 honored couples present from central and southern Indiana represent 8,283 years of marriage and have 685 children, 245 grandchildren and 131 great-grandchildren.

After the jubilarians renewed their marriage vows, the archbishop greeted couples married 60 years and longer.

St. Mark the Evangelist parishioners Donald and Ruth Allen of Indianapolis, the longest married couple present at the Mass, have known each other for 70 years and have been married for 67 years.

They were married at the former St. Catherine Church in Indianapolis on Oct. 26, 1940, and have three children, nine grandchildren, six great-grand­children and two great-great grand­children.

“We’ve been very happy,” Ruth Allen said after the liturgy when asked about their seven decades together.

“Good common sense” helps keep a marriage together, she explained. “We have always prayed, and we get along very well. He’s such a good guy. We have a nice marriage, and we have a nice, educated family. I think the education part is very important.”

Donald Allen said he married “the best girl in the world” and their marriage has “been perfect” because they get along with each other so well.

“We never had a fight,” he said. “God has blessed us and is still blessing us.”

He recommends that couples “go together for a good period of time before they even think about getting married so they get to know each other. … And don’t fight. Come to an agreement on everything.”

For more than 50 years, the Allen family has followed the late Holy Cross Father Patrick Peyton’s request to pray the rosary daily.

“Ruth and I and our children would say the rosary every night,” he explained. “Father Peyton started a rosary crusade, and we went to see him when he was at the ballpark here in Indianapolis, probably during the early 1950s. He never told us to stop so we still pray the rosary every day. We’ll go home and pray it tonight.”

Holy Family parishioners Paul and Mildred Herrman of Richmond have been married for 65 years.

They were married on Oct. 8, 1942, at St. Gabriel Church in Connersville, and have four children, five grandchildren and nine great-grandchildren.

Faith has helped them face challenges in life together, Mildred Herrman said. “He has had cancer three times and is in remission now.”

To have a happy marriage, Paul Herrman said, couples should honor God by following the Ten Commandments.

“Live by the rules that Almighty God has put forth to us,” he said. “Live by the Golden Rule. Treat others as you would like to be treated yourself. … Each one has to give 100 percent.”

Couples have to practice forgiveness every day, he said. “You have to learn to forgive and forget, and the older you get the easier it is to forget.”

Nancy Davisson of Anderson, Ind., sang the “Ave Maria” during the liturgy as a special anniversary gift for her parents, Christ the King parishioners James and Sally Rivelli of Indianapolis, who have been married for 62 years.

They were married on Sept. 3, 1945, at St. Mary Church in Lake Forest, Ill., and have nine children, 22 grandchildren and eight great-grandchildren.

“I was born married,” James Rivelli said, smiling at his wife.

He added that couples who want to have a happy marriage should always “be kind and Christ-like.”

Sally Rivelli said she has told her children to practice “patient endurance” in their married life.

“Just persevere,” she said. “Love your [spouse] and your children.”†

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